At the threshold

For a while I have struggled to sit down and write for this blog.  When I was still in Japan I put off a lot of topics because I just didn’t have the time to research them and present my ideas in the logical and intelligent way I wanted to.  I wanted to write about social issues I saw, but I felt that I owed it to everyone to make sure I backed up my opinions with evidence and research.  I wanted to talk about observations I made in art and culture, but needed to know more about my subjects before I started acting like an expert.  I said that I would have the time when I got home to really put in the background work to talk about topics like art, popular culture, school systems, suicide, sexism, and other hot button topics.  That hasn’t exactly happened. 

While I still want to write about these topics, I still haven’t found the time to do the research.  Life didn’t just stop when I came home.  I am not sure why I thought it would.  I wasn’t constantly traveling like I had been in Japan.  I didn’t have a regular 9-5 job.  But I also didn’t have the daily inspiration and interactions that fueled my desire to discuss these topics with the world.  It seems like the fire dies a little more each day as Japan slips further and further from my immediate existence.  I have started writing for a local newspaper which monopolizes a lot of my research and writing time.  I have also started picking at my fiction writing – something that gathered dust on the shelves in Japan as Okashi and my adventures took up most of my time. 

If I am not careful, I realize that Okashi might end up abandoned, like many of my previous projects.  I don’t want that.  Japan had such an amazing impact on my life that I would hate to let it slip away.  There is still so much to explore, so much to learn, and so much to reconcile within myself about my time there. 

Going forward, I will try and make more of an effort to write down my reflections before they are too faded in my memory.  I might have to sacrifice some of the research I wanted to do in order to just publish a piece.  I might have to get up a little earlier or spend a little more time in front of the computer when I really don’t want to.  I might have to make the sacrifices I didn’t want to make when I was actually in Japan.  My time in Japan has ended and it is time finish this chapter of my life.  A journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step, but it also has to end with one. 

Now it is time to reflect and apply the things I learned on that journey.  As I finish up the reflections I started in Japan and do the research I need to write some of the more controversial pieces, Okashi will begin to change.  It will be more about the continuing influence of Japan in my life. I have a lot of work to do before I get there, but I am excited to see where this new adventure will take me! 

More than any other point in my life I feel like I am standing at a great threshold.  The next step leads to something amazing.  I can feel it.